Saturday, March 16, 2013

Idiot Guide to Malaysian Politics :)

  1. Cronyism is only wrong when it is practiced by the other side.
  2. Corruption is only wrong when it is practiced by the other side. But if he or she join us,  everything is 'halal' again.
  3. If it was d BN Government who proposed an underground tunnel in Penang, PR will go against it – and, vice versa.
  4. Factories are dangerous when the other side builds it – and vice versa.
  5. When the other side talks about race, they are racist. When we talk about race, it’s because we care.
  6. Big projects are wasteful ONLY IF it is a project mooted by the other side. When we moot it, it’s smart economics.
  7. A Satan is a Satan as long as he is on the other side. Join us, immediately Satan becomes an Angel.
  8. If you are not with us, you are against us - even if you are right.
  9. My party and I speak on behalf of God. If you don’t follow us, you will go to hell.
  10. All my leaders are smart; all your leaders are idiots.
  11. When my children move up the political ladder, they are smart. When your children do the same, its nepotism.
  12. My research shows we got more support and will win in the next general elections. Your research that says otherwise sure wrongly done one.
  13. My forensic expert is better than your forensic expert.
  14. When our 2 leaders debate, my leader will always be better. No matter how stupid he or she sounded.
  15. My ulamak is better than your ulamak even if my ulamak did not quote the Quran.
  16. Our idiots are smarter than your experts.
  17. When I disagree it is democracy, when you disagree you are rude, stupid, bought over, influenced, etc etc.
  18. Green is blue when you say it. Blue is green when I say it.
  19. When I give hand-outs it is because I care. When the other side does it, they are buying votes 
  20. Only jokes about the other side are funny.

Note : Siapa makan cili dia terasa pedasnya.

Anas Zubedy

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